i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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