but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize