If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
