before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
