Is it normal to miss your booty call?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
