So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
