I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
