Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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