If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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