Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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