i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
