The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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