Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize