She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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