Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
