I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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