Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
