never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
