Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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