is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize