That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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