My first STD was from a foam party
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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