Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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