Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
