This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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