ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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