after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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