Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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