You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
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