Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
