I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
