Yo dont text me then not text me
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
