Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
