Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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