is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
