the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
