I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
