Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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