Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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