shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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