Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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