i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize