Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
