I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
