All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize