Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
