Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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