im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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