i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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