after a month anything with tits is on the radar
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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